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Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Wednesday Spotlight: Stacey Joy Netzel

THE MANY DEFINITIONS OF ROMANCE

Happy Hump Day. Yech. Personally, I’ve always hated that saying. It’s just so…unromantic. Not that there is anything inherently romantic about Wednesday in particular, but it leads me into my next topic.




My friend Jamie suggested I talk about some of the things that my husband does that normally wouldn’t be considered romantic, but makes me fall for him all over again. I laughed and told her it’d be a short conversation. Then I decided, “Why not? Surely I can come up with something?”


I sat down to write this and my husband happened by. Hah! I grabbed him for an impromptu interview, and this is how it went:

Stacey: Hey, I need your help.

Wayne: Right now?

Stacey: Please? It’ll only take a few minutes. (He nods, still standing, a look of resignation on his face.) Tell me, do you care about romance?

Wayne: (frowns, what kind of question is this?) Maybe when I was younger. (he’s 38!)

Stacey: Okay, so what did you consider romantic back when you were younger?

Wayne: Being together.

Stacey: What do you consider romantic now?

Wayne: I don’t even think about it. (laughs) You’re asking the wrong person. Maybe you should Google it and see what other guys say. (shrugs, cuz I’ve been scribbling down all his words and now he feels a little pressured) I don’t know—get away from everyone and spend time together—ask Donna, see what she says. (Donna’s my friend, cp, and co-author of Welcome to Redemption—and I’ll get to her later.)

Stacey: (last question, because I’m getting nothing here.) Is there anything I do for you that you consider romantic…or nice? (had to add that, because remember, he considers being together romantic—when he was younger and now!)

Wayne: I don’t know, back massages? Those are nice.

So there you have it, a glimpse of my Hero. Anyone wonder why I write romance?

LOL. I love him, wouldn’t trade him for anything, because he does do little things that turn my heart to mush. Not often, but they’re there. Not to mention, he’s a great dad, he works hard to take care of our family, and I know he’ll always be there for us.

Back to Donna, who was part of the discussion of romantic things that may not seem so to others. Her response was: “You mean like how my husband buys me a candy bar every time he stops at a gas station?” He also tells her he loves her every time he hangs up the phone. (Which reminds me, I almost always get a kiss goodbye, and many times hello—even when I’m sitting on the computer and just turn my cheek.)

Another friend, Dulcie, said her husband “looks at Victoria's Secret catalogs and tells me I look as good as those models.” She gave us a good laugh when she tacked on, “I don't know if that's romantic or senility.” As long as he means it, it’s romantic.

Jamie’s husband is pretty near perfect, so she didn’t say much to make us any more jealous than we already are. *grin*

The thing is, we all have our own definition of romance. What’s yours? (Don’t forget, comments give you entries to the regular and bonus give-a-ways at the end of the week.)

Have a great day!

Stacey Joy Netzel



www.StaceyJoyNetzel.com

15 comments:

Donna Marie Rogers said...

Wayne said to ask me? LOL Well, since he's awfully cute I think you should forgive him for those romantic lapses. ;-)

Jamie's husband...sigh...yeah, she got lucky in that department, didn't she? Though we're not doing too bad. Paul brought me home Brain Freeze ice cream the other day. I think he just likes to keep me fat and sassy...LOL

Great blog, Stacey!

Christie Craig said...

Great post, Stacey.

How do I define romance? Romance is two people who desire, respect, and care about each other. They think the other person is special and simply by thinking this, they someone make that other person feel special. They face problems, sure they do. They face hurdles, that's normal, but no hurdle is too large to overcome, because walking away from each other isn't an option.

CC

Stacey Joy Netzel said...

Yep, Donna, Wayne did say that. I really enjoyed 'interviewing' him. He got a little deer-in-the-headlights look about that point. LOL (Tune in tomorrow, everyone, to see if you agree with Donna's opinion of cute.)

Christie--I love that definition of romance! It's perfect! I once had a discussion with another writer who insisted there had to be an external plot keeping the heroine/hero from walking away from each other, but when you love someone, you're right--walking away is NOT an option. Thanks for coming by. :)

Donna Marie Rogers said...

Oh, boy, Stacey, do I remember that particular conversation...LOL

Christie, wow. Is it any wonder why you're one of my new favorite authors? :-)

Carol Ericson said...

The romantic moments between my husband and me are those little shared private moments. I love it when my husband and I laugh hysterically about something and our boys look at each other like we're insane. The other morning we had to get up early for a soccer tournament, and my husband snuggled up with me and said, "let's tuggle for a few minutes." (Tuggle is the word for snuggle in our house ever since my younger son coined it when he was a toddler.) Anyway, my husband's hands started roaming and I said, "that's not a tuggle." He thought a moment and replied, "No, that's a fuggle." We cracked up for about five minutes.

Stacey Joy Netzel said...

Oh, Carol, that's great! LOL Thanks for sharing it with us. I love moments like that around our house, too. It's fun to say things totally innocent to the kids but that mean something different to me and hubby and we can share a laugh. Though, our 16 yr old can figure out a lot more these days, so we have to be careful. Then again, sometimes we just like to watch him shake his head and turn red. LOL It's good for them to 'see' the fun side of marriage, too.

Mary Ricksen said...

Just when I want to klunk him. He does something so nice I am shocked. He's lazy, kinda anal retentive, but he's like my left leg. Walking would be hard without it. And life would be awful without him.

Stacey Joy Netzel said...

Aw, Mary, I can feel the love. LOL Maybe it's just that they know when we've reached our threshhold and think, "Oh, crap, I better buy myself a little more time."

LORETTA CANTON said...

Well, my husband isn't romantic at all but he does worries about me. I take that as him showing his love.

lorettaC,
lbcanton@verizon.net

Stacey Joy Netzel said...

Any show of love is romantic to me, Loretta! Especially if they don't do it that often. Just don't give him too much to worry about. :) Thanks for stopping by.

robynl said...

not much romance here either; today is our 20th anniversary and I did not even get a card. But I love him just the same and once in awhile he comes home with something that he says "I thought you might like some chocolate milk, some special ice cream, some BBQ or Dill Pickle chips and so on.

Stacey Joy Netzel said...

Robyn, I'm very sorry you didn't at least get a card. Happy 20th! That's a great milestone to get to these days. Those little things are nice--and do they even realize how appreciated they are? How a bunch of those little things can be so much better than one big thing a year? I hope you get your ice cream or Dill Pickle chips more often. :)

Good night all! I'm going to go tuggle with my hubby. LOL

Stacey Joy Netzel said...

Posted for Mary Jo Scheibl: (my response after)

Sorry, Stacey, I'm on WisRWA digest so didn't know about yesterday. But I love your topic.

Romance to me at my advanced age means those unexpected little things my hubby does for me, or the quick comment of support when I didn't even realize I needed it.

We've been married so long I have no doubt he loves me. He does bring me a small bouquet of flowers every week and loves to watch while I arrange them. It's always a special time for us.

I also found it so interesting that many of the little things we females loved tied into offerings in the food category. Do men think the way to keep our hearts is through our tummies???
MJ

MJ, they just might! And isn't that how some of us catch them? LOL The flowers are very sweet, I can see how you'd look forward to them each week. :)

Chiron said...

What a great post, and a great topic too. I loved reading your interview, Stacey *laughs* along with all the comments. Romance for women and romance for men. What a difference!

Sometimes I'm at my computer working like crazy, answering emails, leaving comments on blogs *wink*, working on my story or a new essay, and feeling like I'll never catch up. He'll come in and just start rubbing my shoulders. *sigh* To me, that's romantic.

He'll usually remember to get me a card on special days (as long as I remind him) and no longer looks puzzled when I say, "Do you love me?" (but of course he does! *laughs* Now he 'gets it' and says just that). When I'm out of commission he takes over my routine without blinking an eye. And whenever I need him to be strong, whether it's to carry out a spider (*eek!!*) or hold my hand at the doctor, he's there for me.

He's my true hero and even the sound of his voice still gives me shivers of delight.

What does he consider romantic? My guess is back rubs and when I remember his favorite treats. And when I appreciate him. I think guys are hardwired to seek respect, and being appreciated--for their strength, or intelligence, or common sense, or sense of humor--is the way to their heart. Awww!!

Great post! Love the tour, though I do think I'm missing some. Oh, well!!

--Chiron O'Keefe
The Write Soul: www.chironokeefe.blogspot.com

Stacey Joy Netzel said...

Chiron--that's perfect! Most of them do have their moments, don't they? :)