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Monday, May 18, 2009
Monday Spotlight: Charity Tahmaseb and Darcy Vance
The Geek Girls have been writing together as critique partners, then co-authors for more than ten years. There's not much they don't already know about each other ... or is there? Today, Darcy grills Charity. Tomorrow, the tables get turned.
Darcy: Open the yearbook in your mind. Whose picture did you circle? Cross out? Draw puffy purple hearts next to?
Charity: You know what? I never did anything like that. Yearbooks are far, far too accessible. I had my own personal slam book. I used a spiral notebook and then added (with mostly scotch tape) pictures, newspaper clippings, mementos, (oh, look, his fortune cookie fortune. I should keep that …), and so on.
Darcy: Everywhere you look these days, geeks are getting cooler and cooler. There's even a new book out called Geeky Dreamboats. (Want! Want!) Describe your geeky dreamboat.
Charity: My dreamboat has a paddlewheel and floats gently down the Mississippi. Oh, wait, you mean a guy. Okay, my geeky dreamboat does not have a paddlewheel, nor does he float down the Mississippi.
I hadn’t heard about Geeky Dreamboats, but I just found out you can interact with them on Facebook. Dude!
Sorry. I haven’t answered the question. I’m too busy interacting.
Darcy: I used to love those Was My Face Red! columns in teen magazines. Do you have a traumarama moment to share?
Charity: I internalize all my most embarrassing moments and they reappear as fiction. That is all I’m going to say.
Darcy: You recently faced a delicate social decision. Enquiring minds want to know the outcome. Did you Facebook friend the girl who threatened to beat you up in 9th grade?
Charity: I should clarify that she didn’t actually send me a friend request. Her profile pic popped up in my sidebar. With all the tenderness it can muster, Facebook is urging us to be friends.
Commence mini-flashback. A friend and I had just left a football game early (sadly, our team was never all that good). Our school sat on a hill, and we rushed down it, only to find that a group of girls rushed down after us.
They surrounded us. We were backlit by the stadium lights, so it took a few seconds to see who they were and figure out what they wanted. This girl was huge, and in ninth grade, I was teeny tiny. My infraction? I apparently ratted on her to the gym teacher for not doing laps.
Back in eighth grade.
Talk about holding a grudge.
But she did, and was she mad. She did that shoulder shove thing a couple of times, as a warm up for the main event, I guess. I had some M&Ms with me and compulsively plucked one from the bag and popped it into my mouth while I spoke. I explained that this made no sense because if I remembered correctly, I hadn’t finished my laps. Why would I rat her out for something I was guilty of?
Stymied by my brilliant logic, she let me and my friend go. We walked coolly for a few steps, but when we were clear of the stadium lights, we pretty much raced back to her house.
The next week, the girl cornered me by my locker and announced that it was her best friend who had told on her, so I was off the hook.
Wow. With friends like that …
The kicker? I’m sure she doesn’t remember me. Which, maybe, is just as well.
I still get a little freaked out when I see her picture on Facebook.
Darcy: Can you really make an apple pie in a paper bag?
Charity: Actually, it’s bacon and eggs, and yes you can. You use a small (school lunch size) paper bag. Line the bottom with bacon, then crack two eggs over the top. Roll the top and poke a stick through the bag. Then you hold it over the campfire coals.
The bacon cooks first, which in turn cooks the eggs. Don’t believe me? Watch the YouTube: